Shit happens and sometimes i dont cope too well

been trying to deal with depression for past couple of weeks not doing to well i'm a little better today my self confidence is at zero i could do with some help even if its just a message asking how i am. I love being able to help people out as and when i can but half the time i cant help my self at times like these past few weeks I got my mobile and and £100 taken from my wallet at the worst possible time because some of that money were for rent rest were for credit card and on top and with the replacement phone take over a week to get sorted out instead of the 24hrs I lost a week of work another £300 and were almost taken off the agency books over and after a week of being pretty much by myself and really unhappy someone who i thought of as a close friend finally asked me up to london to see her but sadly i had to say no because at the time i were close to flat broke and had so say no at with point she blocked me and flushed the two years of friendship like i were just making a dumb excuse not to see her. witch put me into an even deeper self hating low.

I'm trying to get sorted now and work is ok and i'm holding out hope the we will be friends again
and maybe in future we can sort out a proper day where i can pay my way and at least buy us diner