Sex doesn't seem so important anymore

What an autumn. Got a stroke in September, in the small brain. Had to undergo surgery to fix the broken vessle in my neck. I was ok after that, but then meningitis hit, and pneumonia, and bacteria in the blood. Had to have dialysis since there was complications with medication, so my k**neys has to be saved. I was sedated until the end of october, i think. Had 3 cardiac arrests. But when I woke up, I soon realized I was ok. Bits and pieces of memory, that was a bit blurry the first days, came back. I was still a bit groggy and mixed things up. Had lost enourmous amounts of muscles, so could not stand or walk. Had a tracheotomy and got fed by a tube in my throath. All my long, curly hair was completely gone since they had to shave it all off. But I survived. It all feels so distant now., only a hige ass scar in my neck reminds me of it. And some weird dreams I had when sedated, is lingering. Completely normal.

Thank god I was visiting my parents, in a city with a university/teatching hospital that is one of the best hospitals in the world when it comes to brain surgery/injuries. I then got airlifted to another great hospital. Soooo grateful we have national health service here, all paid by tax, all I paid for was my hospital stay, about 400$ in total.
What a wonderful staff, on all the places I've been. Just wonderful.

I'm now home, came back in the beginning of december. I now walk on my own, getting stronger each day. Still dizzy and got double vision (but corrected with a prisma on my glasses) and I am very tired. But the every day life goes on as normal, I just need to sleep and rest more. I can not drive in another 2-3 months, it's 6 months in total, normal rule after a brain injury. But I have no doubt I will return to completely normal in a couple of years. The fatigue can be there for the rest of my life, if unlucky. Also the occasional dizziness. Probably the meningitis that caused it. But I'm alive and well. Lost a shit ton of weight, lots of it are muscles tho. Gained some since I got home, a couple of lbs, no wonder!

So...sex has not been in focus lately. It'll come back, I'm sure...but I now have to focus on getting better, my mental health is decent, but I'm surely affected by it all. I'm so fucking thankful I survived.</div>