A Practical Guide to Femdom
I was reading blogs this morning and stumbled across the "how to" article below. There are so many blogs and diaries written from the submissive perspective, but significantly fewer from the Domme's view. Every D/s relationship is different, but this woman pretty much sums up the basics of setting up a female led relationship.
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1.) Keeping him locked is keeping him interested.
An important component of a man’s sexual re-education should include experiencing the pleasure of ceding sexual control to his woman. I’ll go out on a limb and say practically any essentially strong marriage or relationship will benefit from male chastity. The reasons are at the same time both complex and simple. In fact I’ll slide out even further on the limb and claim if you’re an average healthy woman and you enjoy a healthy sex-life then male chastity should be an integral part of your life. Your partner will be more complacent and more focused on your needs. Keeping him locked up is non-negotiable. His orgasms are yours to give, not something that he has a right to by default. I'm estimating but I'd say the ratio of my orgasms to his is about 50-1, and the one he gets is in a way of my choosing.
2.) In a FemDom relationship… getting the strap-on is not an option.
He’ll scream like a little bitch the first few times. All of that’s very normal. But just keep at it. Your goal is to make it a very normal part of his experience. After a while some pretty wonderful things will start to happen. His selfish, argumentative masculine edge will dissipate. He will become much more cooperative and attentive to your needs. His submissive side will come out and blossom. He will become much less concerned with his orgasms, and more focused on yours. Leave him in chastity while you penetrate him. His erogenous zone will slowly start to shift from the head of his penis to the opening to his asshole and his prostate gland. It is therefore very important to make sure your partner receives a good pegging often. Start with smaller dildos and increase the size as he learns to accommodate. I also make my slave wear a large buttplug now for several hours a day, so that I don't have to waste a lot of time prepping him when I feel the urge to peg him. If you train him right he'll always be ready and you can take him hard and fast from the get-go.
3.)If he cums, he cleans
If you have given your partner the privilege of an orgasm, it is vital that he cleans up his own mess. It doesn't matter if he came in your pussy, on himself or on the floor. It is a vital part of his submission that you force him to clean up. Remember that your orgasm always comes before his.
4.) If you have penetrative sex with your slave, stay in control
I recommend not having sex penetrative sex with your slave, but when you crave sexual relief and you don't have a lover, you must ensure it is done in a way that not only satisfies you, but maintains your dignity and dominance over your partner. You can do this by using the Cowgirl position, where you control the entry and penetration of his penis into you but the best way is probably the Amazon Position. Never, ever let him do the thrusting. Use his cock and make him remain still.
Place your partner on his back with hands behind his head, tell him to keep them there. Handcuff him if you want. Then, lift and spread his legs and push them backwards toward his shoulders (like you would normally do when you fuck him with your strapon). Pull his erect cock up and sit on it, riding him up-and-down with your crotch pressing onto his ass. Ride him harder and harder, as you push back his legs to his shoulders, and pushing his cock deeper into you. You are now in full control as an "Amazon" fucking him.
5.) Submissive men wear panties
At least most of the time A simple way to enforce your dominance is to each day decide if your partner can wear normal underwear or should wear girly panties. Simply lay them out before you go to bed each day, it takes less then a minute it will definitely make his submissive clock tick! if you want to take it a step further you could send him to work wearing holdup stockings. No one will notice but he'll be reminded of his status every minute of the day.
6.) Spank him, paddle him, cane him, whip him....a lot.
Rigorously adhering to a schedule of discipline sessions for a submissive partner is very important to hold him accountable for his behavior and your pleasure. You don't have to punish on the spot (although I sometimes do), but you can't let anything slide or he will continue to make bad choices or generally fuck-up a task. At a scheduled time (s) each week, you and your partner know that you will have him over your lap, over the back of a chair, or over the edge of the bed for an extended session with the cane or what ever tool you select. This sessions may include or be preceded by reminding him about his behavior of late, and a recounting of what has pleased you and what has left you wondering exactly how lazy he thought you should allow him to become. This is the session that will fix that laziness and it provides the opportunity for you to vent your dominant energy. Spankings are meant to hurt as your partner is supposed to actually learn from the lessons you try to teach him, and for me it scratches my sadistic urge to watch him endure pain for me. As long as the blows are directed on his butt and upper legs, you can inflict a great deal of pain without really hurting him. Make him count and thank you for each stroke. Increase or decrease the number and severity of strokes depending on his performance and behavior. Tears and begging don't work with me. It's over when I say it's over.
7.) Get a lover.. You deserve the best.
I made a post about the importance of cuckolding not so long ago so I will keep this simple. Getting a lover is something you do for yourself, regardless how your slave feels about it. As a dominant woman you deserve hot steamy sex whenever you want with whomever you want. Personally, I enjoy being cleaned by my slave post orgasm, but I sometimes play without him. I select my lovers purely on a physical basis. Generally, they are younger in shape studs with large cocks. I love my slave, but my bulls are essential in my sex life.
Putting the above together
Keeping up a FemDom relationship can take effort and it is important to try and keep that effort to a minimum by training him well. Therefore it is important that you keep it simple: Spanking no less than once a week – unless he deserves something additional. Set a time and keep to it usually this will take no more than 15 minutes of your time. Believe me, it's 15 minutes well spent.
He is always to wear a chastity cage of which only you have the key and is to wear the underwear you prepare for him. Again, strong reminders for him that you are in charge with minimal effort from your side. Picking out his panties for the next day takes about 1 minute and can actually be a lot of fun. Keeping him chaste has great benefits and minimal effort as well. When he's chaste you control his mind as well as his body.
Peg him hard. Peg him often. The combination of chastity and pegging has probably had the greatest impact on his submission to me. I have learned to love it, too, and have found ways to stimulate my clit to orgasm while I do it. He can almost cum from pegging, also, but if I see him dripping precum then I slow down or stop. Basically, I stimulate his prostate to the edge of orgasm then back off. It drives him to tears....which I love to see.
Last but definitely not least, start looking for a second (or third, or fourth, etc..) man in your life if you don't have a lover yet. If your partner is anything like mine, he'll crave it even more than you.
I'm sharing this because there are so many of you who want to take the plunge, but aren't sure how to go about it. There are many shades of gray, but the above information is what works for me. Be strong and dominate and your man. I promise he will love you for it.
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1.) Keeping him locked is keeping him interested.
An important component of a man’s sexual re-education should include experiencing the pleasure of ceding sexual control to his woman. I’ll go out on a limb and say practically any essentially strong marriage or relationship will benefit from male chastity. The reasons are at the same time both complex and simple. In fact I’ll slide out even further on the limb and claim if you’re an average healthy woman and you enjoy a healthy sex-life then male chastity should be an integral part of your life. Your partner will be more complacent and more focused on your needs. Keeping him locked up is non-negotiable. His orgasms are yours to give, not something that he has a right to by default. I'm estimating but I'd say the ratio of my orgasms to his is about 50-1, and the one he gets is in a way of my choosing.
2.) In a FemDom relationship… getting the strap-on is not an option.
He’ll scream like a little bitch the first few times. All of that’s very normal. But just keep at it. Your goal is to make it a very normal part of his experience. After a while some pretty wonderful things will start to happen. His selfish, argumentative masculine edge will dissipate. He will become much more cooperative and attentive to your needs. His submissive side will come out and blossom. He will become much less concerned with his orgasms, and more focused on yours. Leave him in chastity while you penetrate him. His erogenous zone will slowly start to shift from the head of his penis to the opening to his asshole and his prostate gland. It is therefore very important to make sure your partner receives a good pegging often. Start with smaller dildos and increase the size as he learns to accommodate. I also make my slave wear a large buttplug now for several hours a day, so that I don't have to waste a lot of time prepping him when I feel the urge to peg him. If you train him right he'll always be ready and you can take him hard and fast from the get-go.
3.)If he cums, he cleans
If you have given your partner the privilege of an orgasm, it is vital that he cleans up his own mess. It doesn't matter if he came in your pussy, on himself or on the floor. It is a vital part of his submission that you force him to clean up. Remember that your orgasm always comes before his.
4.) If you have penetrative sex with your slave, stay in control
I recommend not having sex penetrative sex with your slave, but when you crave sexual relief and you don't have a lover, you must ensure it is done in a way that not only satisfies you, but maintains your dignity and dominance over your partner. You can do this by using the Cowgirl position, where you control the entry and penetration of his penis into you but the best way is probably the Amazon Position. Never, ever let him do the thrusting. Use his cock and make him remain still.
Place your partner on his back with hands behind his head, tell him to keep them there. Handcuff him if you want. Then, lift and spread his legs and push them backwards toward his shoulders (like you would normally do when you fuck him with your strapon). Pull his erect cock up and sit on it, riding him up-and-down with your crotch pressing onto his ass. Ride him harder and harder, as you push back his legs to his shoulders, and pushing his cock deeper into you. You are now in full control as an "Amazon" fucking him.
5.) Submissive men wear panties
At least most of the time A simple way to enforce your dominance is to each day decide if your partner can wear normal underwear or should wear girly panties. Simply lay them out before you go to bed each day, it takes less then a minute it will definitely make his submissive clock tick! if you want to take it a step further you could send him to work wearing holdup stockings. No one will notice but he'll be reminded of his status every minute of the day.
6.) Spank him, paddle him, cane him, whip him....a lot.
Rigorously adhering to a schedule of discipline sessions for a submissive partner is very important to hold him accountable for his behavior and your pleasure. You don't have to punish on the spot (although I sometimes do), but you can't let anything slide or he will continue to make bad choices or generally fuck-up a task. At a scheduled time (s) each week, you and your partner know that you will have him over your lap, over the back of a chair, or over the edge of the bed for an extended session with the cane or what ever tool you select. This sessions may include or be preceded by reminding him about his behavior of late, and a recounting of what has pleased you and what has left you wondering exactly how lazy he thought you should allow him to become. This is the session that will fix that laziness and it provides the opportunity for you to vent your dominant energy. Spankings are meant to hurt as your partner is supposed to actually learn from the lessons you try to teach him, and for me it scratches my sadistic urge to watch him endure pain for me. As long as the blows are directed on his butt and upper legs, you can inflict a great deal of pain without really hurting him. Make him count and thank you for each stroke. Increase or decrease the number and severity of strokes depending on his performance and behavior. Tears and begging don't work with me. It's over when I say it's over.
7.) Get a lover.. You deserve the best.
I made a post about the importance of cuckolding not so long ago so I will keep this simple. Getting a lover is something you do for yourself, regardless how your slave feels about it. As a dominant woman you deserve hot steamy sex whenever you want with whomever you want. Personally, I enjoy being cleaned by my slave post orgasm, but I sometimes play without him. I select my lovers purely on a physical basis. Generally, they are younger in shape studs with large cocks. I love my slave, but my bulls are essential in my sex life.
Putting the above together
Keeping up a FemDom relationship can take effort and it is important to try and keep that effort to a minimum by training him well. Therefore it is important that you keep it simple: Spanking no less than once a week – unless he deserves something additional. Set a time and keep to it usually this will take no more than 15 minutes of your time. Believe me, it's 15 minutes well spent.
He is always to wear a chastity cage of which only you have the key and is to wear the underwear you prepare for him. Again, strong reminders for him that you are in charge with minimal effort from your side. Picking out his panties for the next day takes about 1 minute and can actually be a lot of fun. Keeping him chaste has great benefits and minimal effort as well. When he's chaste you control his mind as well as his body.
Peg him hard. Peg him often. The combination of chastity and pegging has probably had the greatest impact on his submission to me. I have learned to love it, too, and have found ways to stimulate my clit to orgasm while I do it. He can almost cum from pegging, also, but if I see him dripping precum then I slow down or stop. Basically, I stimulate his prostate to the edge of orgasm then back off. It drives him to tears....which I love to see.
Last but definitely not least, start looking for a second (or third, or fourth, etc..) man in your life if you don't have a lover yet. If your partner is anything like mine, he'll crave it even more than you.
I'm sharing this because there are so many of you who want to take the plunge, but aren't sure how to go about it. There are many shades of gray, but the above information is what works for me. Be strong and dominate and your man. I promise he will love you for it.
8 年 前
