30 Hilarious Hospital Chart Bloopers EVER
1. “Patient has left white blood cells at another hospital.”
2. “She has no rigors or shaking chills, but her husband states she was very hot in bed last night.”
3. “On the second day, the knee was better, and on the third day it disappeared.”
4. “The patient is tearful and crying constantly. She also appears to be depressed.”
5. “Patient had waffles for breakfast and anorexia for lunch.”
6. “The patient has been depressed since she began seeing me in 1993.”
7. “While in ER, she was examined, X-rated and sent home.”
8. “Patient was present when suppository was inserted.”
9. “Patient vomited a large amount of emesis.”
10. “Alert with episodes of forgetfulness.”
11. “Pt has hx of PICKLE cell anemia.”
12. “Vaginal packing out, Dr. Lee in.”
13. “Bleeding began in the rectal area and continued all the way to Los Angeles.”
14. “Surgery will be performed under General Anastasia.”
15. “The pelvic examination will be done later on the floor.”
16. “Skin: Somewhat pale but present.”
17. “Large brown stool ambulating in the hall. ”
18. “Patient has two teenage ch*ldren but no other abnormalities.”
19. “The patient refused an autopsy.”
20. “She is numb from her toes down.”
21. “Exam of genitalia reveals that he is circus sized.”
22. “The patient was prepped and r@ped in the usual manner.”
23. “Both breasts are equal and reactive to light and accommodation.”
24. “Suppositories given, sat on the toilet with no result, will try again after christmas.”
25. “Social history reveals this 1 year old patient does not smoke or drink and is presently unemployed.”
26. “Patient’s foot was amputated above the knee.”
27. “Following the exam of her breasts we discussed the impending nasal surgery.”
28. “His prognosis was poor, having a massive cerebral hemorrhoid.”
29. “Rectal exam reveals normal-size thyroid.”
30. “Both her old and new noses have been placed in our album.”
2. “She has no rigors or shaking chills, but her husband states she was very hot in bed last night.”
3. “On the second day, the knee was better, and on the third day it disappeared.”
4. “The patient is tearful and crying constantly. She also appears to be depressed.”
5. “Patient had waffles for breakfast and anorexia for lunch.”
6. “The patient has been depressed since she began seeing me in 1993.”
7. “While in ER, she was examined, X-rated and sent home.”
8. “Patient was present when suppository was inserted.”
9. “Patient vomited a large amount of emesis.”
10. “Alert with episodes of forgetfulness.”
11. “Pt has hx of PICKLE cell anemia.”
12. “Vaginal packing out, Dr. Lee in.”
13. “Bleeding began in the rectal area and continued all the way to Los Angeles.”
14. “Surgery will be performed under General Anastasia.”
15. “The pelvic examination will be done later on the floor.”
16. “Skin: Somewhat pale but present.”
17. “Large brown stool ambulating in the hall. ”
18. “Patient has two teenage ch*ldren but no other abnormalities.”
19. “The patient refused an autopsy.”
20. “She is numb from her toes down.”
21. “Exam of genitalia reveals that he is circus sized.”
22. “The patient was prepped and r@ped in the usual manner.”
23. “Both breasts are equal and reactive to light and accommodation.”
24. “Suppositories given, sat on the toilet with no result, will try again after christmas.”
25. “Social history reveals this 1 year old patient does not smoke or drink and is presently unemployed.”
26. “Patient’s foot was amputated above the knee.”
27. “Following the exam of her breasts we discussed the impending nasal surgery.”
28. “His prognosis was poor, having a massive cerebral hemorrhoid.”
29. “Rectal exam reveals normal-size thyroid.”
30. “Both her old and new noses have been placed in our album.”
6 年 前
A local sheriff deputy once wrote a friend of my mother a ticket after a routine traffic stop. The offense?
“Subject had no license in puss” (Fortunately?)