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I'm a British ex-pat, enjoying life in Mexico.

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ONE OF THE BEST DIRTY JOKES I KNOW IS:

Three newlywed couples check into a very posh hotel for their honeymoons. The grooms soon get talking in the bar and hatch a plan on how they can cunningly communicate at breakfast as to how many times they have been able to have sex with their nubile brides on the morning after the first night.

"Why don't we order as many slices of toast as we have sex!" Suggests the first groom and the others agree.

In the morning they are settling down to breakfast and the first groom says to the waiter, "I'll have three slices of toast, please."

The second groom, with a little chuckle to himself, orders "Four slices for me!"

The third groom puffs up his chest and tells the waiter, "It's SIX slices of toast for me... and make two of them brown!"